Brasilmagic\’s Weblog

Venting to the World

Old Glory Women

 

You sometimes see these middle aged to old ladies, in their late 50’s, 60’s and 70’s, in the pharmacy, in the local supermarket, and you look at their weathered, beaten, wrinkled, spotted or saggy face and you can still see the traces of very nice features, what once was probably a very beautiful woman. Some still carry their heads high, some have a lot of expensive gold jewelry, some are wearing an old beaten up coat of high quality (cashemere), some wear their hair still long and in exquisite updos like they did back in the 50’s…I call them the Old Glory women.

These are women who once enjoyed a high quality of life, where money was never a problem-or even talked about. They were usually married to well to do men who either left them for a younger woman when they were entering middle age, screwing them financially in the process and leaving them with no skills, formal education or job experience. Or their husbands died but had little left at the end, because they either lost their fortunes by bad business decisions, illness or the many ways in which a person can go from riches to rags in this life. They live in small pensions and struggle to survive. I suspect  that in their heads they live in the past, reminiscing of the good old times where they were Mrs. Such and such and had a standing in society. Were invited to lavish parties and everyone wanted to be their friend.

You see them often lonely, paying their groceries with dollar bills, while in their spotted hand you see a wonderful piece of jewelry. You see their shoes are cheap, but on their shoulders rests a wonderful mink stole (which the ex-husband was not able to take with him 🙂 from the good old times. I look in these ladies’ spacy eyes and I see a lot of grief, a lot of loneliness and sometimes a crazy gaze, as if the disappointments of life have made them a bit off, a bit insane. I often feel sorry for them, as I can imagine  how hard it must be to lose your lifestyle when you get older.

Some of them are in denial with the passage of time, and  try to wear the same clothes a 20 year old would wear; they wear their hair long with ribbons like a 15 year old, or small bikinis at the beach, or plaster a  lot of make up which makes them look like a clown. I suppose they hang on to the decades where their beauty was so striking, where they had the power to make any man melt in their hands, where the world bowed to their beauty.

The Potomac/Bethesda area in the DC suburbs have many of these old glory women, and I believe New York City as well. Any older area which was once very affluent has these women, as women usually outlive men.

But the  decades to come might have less Old Glory women around. Young women now know they cannot depend on a man and that NO marriage is safe. They know they must have their own means of support in case anything happens. When I hear women from this generation saying they want to get married and be a stay at home mom, I feel like telling them to curb that cozy domestic feeling because life is not  predictable. Husbands die, husbands lose jobs, businesses’ fail and husbands cheat-or leave you for someone else. 

As I have always told my daughters: be able to support yourselves, always. Never depend on anyone. You can and should take a break when your kids are very young, but you should not stop learning and updating your skills so you can come back easily to the job market. After all, the children are both parents’ responsability, and the man can also slow down careeerwise to help raise them until they grow more independant.

Additionally, very beautiful women have to to remember that beauty fades, and that beauty alone will not sustain them through life. They must learn skills, get an education and contribute to society.

Many Hollywood starlets get very depressed and start drinking when they lose the only thing they have: looks. Marylin Monroe killed herself at the age of 36, which in those days was approaching retirement in Hollywood. If a beautiful woman develops other areas of her life, she will be able to transfer that side into new venues of satisfaction, whether it is volunteering, politics, hobbies, a new business, etc., when the power of her beauty no longer exists.

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February 9, 2009 - Posted by | Society

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