Brasilmagic\’s Weblog

Venting to the World

You just don’t call your woman a “B”

I have heard compaints from some foreign women who date or married American men on how they, during an argument, call them a B*tch. There is a cultural difference going on. In many cultures, such as the Brazilian culture, you NEVER, in any circumstance, call your girlfriend or wife this name. This is the ultimate disrespect. You also don’t call your mother, your sister or your daugter that name. And preferably, you don’t call any woman that name, even the ones who cross you. You can call them “difficult”, “demanding”, “rude”, “obnoxious”, but not a B. The meaning of a B is the female dog, who has sex with any dog she sees. At least that is the meaning of the word B in Portuguese: “cadela”. It is the ultimate offense, and if directed to your partner, a sign the relationship is past down the rocks.

All in all, name calling is verbal abuse.  Within the realm of a relationship, it is demeaning and destructive. Some Americans use the F word in every sentence, and call every man a “Son of a B” or an “A-hole”, and call every woman who disagrees with them a B. We automatically think of crooks, drug dealers and trailer trash. But movies and the rap scene have made name calling more mainstream, and you see otherwise nice, normal and middle class young people coloring their conversations wtih these “expressions”.

For these foreign women (a Russian friend of  mine complained about this as well, and she is thinking of divorce), being called a B is worse than getting slapped. For Brazilian women too, I believe it is something that we will never accept. So for American men who date or marry Brazilian women, watch your language and never, ever, call your lover the B word.

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January 24, 2009 - Posted by | Difference between cultures

2 Comments »

  1. I really like your blog. I do have to tell you… “bitch” here, doesn’t exactly always mean “puta” or “cadela” but means more like a very MEAN woman. Like, if I were fighting with my boyfriend and I was being just mean and yelling at him he might say, “You are being a bitch.” and I wouldn’t be extremely offended since I would be being “mean” to him. However, in this context, this has nothing to do with me having sex with anyone I see, but just that I am not being nice. This seems to be a common misconception based on the tranlsation.

    Now, don’t get me wrong, in a rap video, for instance, if a guy says “my bitch” this does more have a connotation to a “slutty” girl.

    Even here a girl might say (about another girl) “Oh, she is being bitchy” meaning that her friend is just being miserable/mean/chata etc.

    Hope that made sense.

    Comment by beth | March 25, 2009 | Reply

  2. Beth, I know what you are saying. “You are acting like a B” is ok, but calling someone straight to your face a B is not nice, and if it comes from your boyfriend or husband it’s plain emotional abuse. All the other instances are ok, I agree with you. Bur from your man….no.

    Comment by Grace Farrell | March 27, 2009 | Reply


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